"I did it,” said Erin with a weak but triumphant voice. Her mother and best friend smiled and cheered her on in chorus. Erin was being wheeled on a gurney to a post operation recovery room. The young woman had just undergone a complicated Gastric Bypass Surgery. Erin had recently reached her heaviest weight of 347 pounds. She knew that she must make positive changes or die as a consequence. The idea of death frightened Erin. There was much she wanted to experience in terms of life, love, family, and motherhood. This phobia animated her feet and heart into action when mustering the courage to call on her physician. Erin wasn’t always overweight. In fact she described herself as, “under weight and the smallest in her class.” It wasn’t until she was twelve years old that she began to put on the pounds. Stressors at home contributed to her battle with food. Erin’s father was an alcoholic, although she never saw him lift a bottle to his mouth. He would hide his addiction by getting drunk at local bars prior to going home. Although Erin was young when the problem came to a head; she felt instinctively that her father had a severe problem. The tension continued to reverberate causing her mother to work around the clock to keep the family afloat. Which sent little Erin to a string of baby sitters whom she resented and hated. The weight began to steadily increase, thus causing additional anxiety and stress.
The pattern of over eating went from troublesome to problematic after Erin's father died. “I would go into panic attacks if I couldn't control things. After my dad died, I thought that if he could die (which was out of my control) then anything could happen. I became scared of everything.” Erin turned to food as a comfort. She could control the food she ate, frequency, and the experience or high she felt as direct result. Food became a drug for Erin. She no longer ate for nutrition but consumed food to fill the pain she continually endured. Erin gained 65 pounds while coping with her father’s passing.
Soon Erin’s weight climbed to 200 pounds, then 250, followed by 300 pounds. Every time her weight spiked to another fifty pound increment she would say, “Well I’ll never get to 250 pounds, that’s just crazy.” But she did gain the weight, and gained more and more, finally reaching her climax weight of 347 pounds. She couldn’t believe she had let her weight wildly slip out of grasp. Erin knew she must change internally and externally. Her primary solution was the surgery, but that was just the first step on a long journey she would have to make for recovery.
Two years later Erin weighs one hundred pounds less than the day of her surgery. She freely admits that she still has much to do in terms of her goals, but she’s working on reshaping her relationship with food. Erin is a member of Eaters Anonymous and attends meetings three to four times per week. She has sworn off certain foods that sent her into past frenzies, namely fast food and doughnuts. Erin understood immediately through her E.A. program that food isn’t just vitamins and nourishment to certain people, and that she is among those numbers. “People don’t realize that food is a drug. I still ‘use’ food and have a hard time. I have anxiety about it, but it’s getting better.”
Erin’s advice to women who struggle with their reflection is to seek a higher power for courage, and share thoughts and feelings with others. When Erin opened up about her fears and struggles, she grew closer to her friends and was inspired by their stories. Swiftly she realized that no one is perfect. Every woman has their personal battles to combat. Through borrowed strength, she was able to share her story and learn from others. On perseverance Erin shares her current view, “Some days I’m still hard on myself, I feel like I could do better. But then I think I’m doing all I can, and that’s all any of us can do.”
"I did it,” said 
